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Random Magic by Sasha Soren: Book Review

Professor Random has sneezed Alice right out of Wonderland. He sends young Henry Witherspoon into the book to find her and put her in her place before the world as we know it comes to an end. But Henry accidentally gets sent into the wrong book. Luckily, he meets the unflappable doodle witch, Winnie Flapjack, who takes him under her wing and helps him find his missing Alice. This book is for those people who actually believe that it's about the journey and not the destination. Me? I just want to get where I'm going. The book was fun, and I enjoyed seeing where Winnie and Henry were going to end up next and how they were going to get out of their current mess. The overall plot of finding Alice isn't a very big deal in the book though. It's more of an excuse to throw everything together. I enjoy books more if everything flows together better. Winnie's solutions to problems were ingenious. Change live to dead? She can do that, no sweat. Defeat a crazy queen in chess? Sure. Take on a boat full of pirates? All in a day's work to Winnie. Henry was a different matter. He was a loyal little thing with a big heart, but he was a little slow. He never learned to just do what Winnie said; he was always questioning her. He always came out the worse for it. The pacing was a little off for my taste. Some of the vignettes dragged on too long for me. Oh! I almost forgot! The prologue is confusing. As far as I can tell, it has very little to do with the rest of the book. So just skip it. My sister grabbed this and read it while she was house-sitting for me,…

Changeless by Gail Carriger: Book Review

Alexia Maccon, née Tarrabotti, is awakened one morning by her husband bellowing out orders and questions. He doesn't take time to answer her questions, but of course she finds out what's going on later. Something or someone has found a way to completely negate whatever magic makes supernatural beings, well--supernatural. This has London in an uproar. When the phenomenon seems to be traveling north to Scotland, Lord Maccon sets out in that direction too. He wants to investigate further, plus he needs to check in with his old pack. Alexia just can't be left behind, so one dirigible ride later, she joins him up there to find the pack in disarray. Another fun entry into The Parasol Protectorate! I swear I smiled and giggled the whole way through. Alexia is just as hardheaded and Lord Maccon is just as Alpha. Yum-mmmeeeee. *Waggling eyebrows lasciviously* Alexia is settling into her role as the Woolsey pack's Alpha female with ease. It's a role she was practically made for. There's one confrontation with a member of the pack who has just returned from India that left me laughing. She handled him as only Alexia can. She manages to get herself into even more trouble this time around, believe it or not. A strange French inventor, Madame Lefoux, makes an appearance too. We're never quite sure what her role is in everything, but she had me hopelessly intrigued. She is to Alexia as Q is to Bond. Talk about a tricked-out parasol! She hooks Alexia up! MacGyver would be jealous of this thing! She's wonderfully eccentric and I couldn't help but love her even as I wondered about her loyalties. Ivy Hisselpenny and Alexia's sister Felicity have a much-larger role in this book, and all I have to say about that is, "Poor Tunstell.…

One for the Money by Janet Evanovich: Book Review

Stephanie Plum has just gotten laid off from her job as a lingerie buyer for a company that turned out to be owned by the mob in New Jersey. Her Miata has just been repossessed, she's sold everything of value, and her refrigerator is empty. Out of desperation, she goes to see her cousin Vinnie, a bail bondsman, about a filing job. That's just been filled, but the secretary lets her know that there's an opening for a bounty hunter, and the money's good. Stephanie blackmails her way into taking a case that will pay out $10,000 if she can bring the guy in. It turns out the fugitive is someone she has a long history with who appears to be a cop gone bad. He's been arrested for cold-blooded murder. Of course, Stephanie is unbelievably unqualified for this job, but a mixture of desperation, pride, and stubborness take her a long way. This was a quick, fun read, but there was still plenty of murder and mayhem for most mystery/thriller readers. This was actually pretty funny. I don't think I ever laughed out loud, but I probably giggled a few times. I had expected it to be a little funnier and less violent from what someone had told me about it, but this was still a good book. One thing that did irritate me was that the author pretty much gave driving directions to every place Stephanie went in the book. That might make it more real to the people from Trenton, NJ, but to me it was just distracting fluff for me to skip over. The characters were what really made the book. You have to like Stephanie. She comes across as just an average woman who's gotten in over her head, but she doesn't let that stop…

The Secret Lives of Princesses by Philippe Lechermeier: Book Review

Sure, you know all about the fairy tale princesses. There's that Cinderella chick and her pumpkin coach. Another fell asleep for a hundred years or so. And wasn't there one who had crazy-long hair? Sure, you know them. You don't know these princesses. Covering a gamut of traits, from Princess Hot-Head to Princess Eelizabeth (not a typo), you will learn all about princesses that you didn't know existed. Each princess has a lovely full-color, full-page portrait and a brief biography. Two of my favorites were Princess Paige--"She reads everything she can find: novels, poetry, philosophy, and tall tales"--and Princess of the Disorient--"Her kingdom fits her image: wacky, filled with fools, and complete with nutty celebrations." You know you're intrigued now! There are more than princesses in this book. There are all kinds of tips on princess behavior and style. Every princess needs a confidante. And exactly how does the fashionable princess outfit her elephant for traveling? This book comes complete with a diagram. Seriously, I saw a review for this and knew I had to have it. My husband obliged and got it for me for my birthday. Even though I was in the middle of a scavenger hunt for my gifts, I had to stop and pore over this book for a while. Trust me, nothing comes between me and my presents. I put it down after a few minutes (a lifetime in between gifts!) and went off to finish looking for everything else. When I had time that night, I picked this back up and started reading it again. I was surprised that it was so long. It's 92 fully-illustrated pages! I loved reading everything in it. It was just whimsically perfect for me. I adore the illustrations. At least pick it up if you see it in…

A Short History of Nearly Everything by Bill Bryson: Book Review

Bill Bryson is back and this time's he's tackling the question of "Where do we come from?" in a very accessible kind of way. He gives an everyman's scientific explanation of the creation of the universe, the world, the atmosphere, evolution, human evolution, you name it. Pretty much all the sciences are covered, from astronomy to physics to geology to biology and plenty more that I can't think of at the moment. I'm not really a non-fiction person. I'm just not. But Bill Bryson usually keeps me entertained with his witty writing style. He didn't really manage to be witty while writing about science, but he was interesting. Probably some of my favorite parts were back stories about how odd some of the most famous scientists were (Did you know that Sir Isaac Newton, probably one of the most brilliant scientists that has ever or will ever live, decided to shove a big needle into the back of his eye one time, just to see what would happen?). I also got my biology degree once upon a time, so he did get around to covering stuff that does obviously interest me. There was absolutely no mention of creationism in this book, so I wouldn't recommend it to people who would be offended by that. He did get a little environmentally preachy right at the very end, but that didn't bother me. If you're interested in how things work--or, sometimes, just how scientists think things might work--this book is for you.

Bite Me by Christopher Moore: Book Review

I don't think I can even begin to explain the appeal of these books. A synopsis is going to make it sound ridiculous. A giant shaved vampire cat named Chet is stalking the San Francisco night? Puh-leeze. Except that leaves out Abby Normal, Emergency Backup Mistress of the Greater Bay Area Night. I. ♥ This. Chick. Abby is hilarious! I loved her in You Suck: A Love Story and I was thrilled when I found out that she tells most of this newest story. She makes grown men cry. She intimidates the hell out of Foo-Dog, her manga-haired love monkey. I mean, she wears Skankenstein boots. What more do you need to know? There are vampire cats, rats, and birds; a Samurai-sword-wielding old guy; UV-light jackets and dusters; UV, um, bazookas? that rack up serious points in the vampire elimination game; vampires climbing face first down walls a la Dracula; a fortune-teller who actually gets it right but doesn't understand any of it; a sea captain named Kona who speaks like a Rasta; truly crazy vampires; and overseeing it all is The Emperor of San Francisco, protector of Alcatraz, Sausalito, and Treasure Island and his two loyal men, Bummer and Lazarus. Sound over the top? It is. But it's so much fun. So take note beyotches. There will be a test. Yes, that's pretty much a quote. If it offended you, steer clear because this won't be the book for you. The f-bomb abounds.

All Creatures Great and Small by James Herriot: Book Review

I don't have a review written up for this book, but I have loved it since the first time I read it. It was summer break, I must have been in high school, and I had finished all the books I had checked out from the library. I didn't feel like re-reading anything, so in desperation I checked out my parents' bookshelves. Why I looked on my dad's, I will never know. He really only ever reads westerns, which I had no interest in at that point of my life! Anyway, after quite a bit of digging, I found this little gem. I sat down to read, and I had tears of laughter rolling down my face within the first few pages! I was hooked. On a non-fiction book at that! James Herriot was a vet in Yorkshire and he mostly writes about the early years of his practice, around the time of WWII. This was before the days of antibiotics, so there really wasn't all that much vets could do. But Jim, his boss Siegfried and Siegfried's brother, Tristan made their rounds, doing the best they could for their patients. They also date the local women and play pranks on each other. James' dating stories are hilarious! And Tristan will be one of your favorite people ever. The Mad Conductor scene should be a classic and required reading for everyone. I couldn't breathe, I was laughing so hard at that one. James is a natural storyteller and reading the pages of his book, I laugh, I cry, I celebrate the small victories, get angry at the injustices, and just generally experience everything that makes us human. I can't recommend this series enough.

The Lightning Thief by Rick Riordan: Book Review

Percy Jackson and the Olympians: The Lightning Thief hits theaters today. I have to admit that I'm pretty excited to see it. I loved the book, the cast is amazing, and the trailer is exciting. I just wish that they had found an actor who is actually Percy's age to play Percy. He's what--12 in the book? Logan Lerman is seventeen. His voice has already broken, for crying out loud! Still, I liked Lerman in 3:10 to Yuma, and I think he'll do a good job with the part. I just don't really see him as Percy at this point. Maybe he'll change my mind. Oh, and that amazing cast makes me nervous too. It seems like a movie with too many famous names just never lives up to expectations. (I'm looking at you, The Royal Tenenbaums, my first vote for Worst Movie Ever) Anyway, without further ado, here is my review of the book. Percy Jackson tries to be good, but circumstances just don't allow it. Trouble always seems to find him. Let's not talk about what happens to his math teacher his sixth grade year.... At the end of sixth grade, Percy and his mom take off for a trip to the beach. Late in the night, it sounds like a hurricane blows up and they're running for their lives. Percy winds up at Half-Blood Hill, a summer camp for the children of...Greek gods? An evil plot is afoot and Percy needs to clear his name and unravel the mystery with the help of his two friends, Annabeth and Grover. I loved this! I've always enjoyed mythology and this was an original take on the old myths for children. But don't think it's only for children--adults will enjoy it too. Percy, Annabeth and Grover are fantastic, smart, fun…

Soulless by Gail Carriger: Book Review

I have waited entirely too long to write this review and gotten too deeply involved in Ken Follett's World Without End, so this review is going to suck a little. Which is a pity because I had thought of all kinds of witty things I was going to write and now I've lost them. Miss Alexia Tarabotti is soulless. When she touches supernatural beings, she neutralizes their abilities and they become human for a moment. That could be useful to the Bureau of Unnatural Registry if she weren't a lady of good breeding. She refuses to be treated as a wilting lily and goes about, wielding her tricked-out parasol and assisting in any way she can, as new vampires who appear to be entirely clueless about supernatural laws go about wreaking havoc on society. I loved the chemistry between Alexia and Lord Maccon from the moment he threatens to bring her out of a faint with something stronger than smelling salts. He's an Alpha werewolf, but Alexia has enough alpha personality to hold her own against him. Their subtle yet pointed verbal sparring made this book for me. And can you say steamy? It wasn't too graphic, but oh my gosh. *Fanning* Alexia herself was a fantastic character. At twenty-six, she's firmly on the shelf in Victorian society, but she's okay with that. Better to be on the shelf than married to some half-wit who can't keep up with her own intellect and curiosity. She gets enough of that from her family. They don't know she's soulless and put all of her quirks down to the fact that her father was Italian. But they've left her just a little insecure about her appearance and desirability. Just enough to make her feel real. And Lord Maccon. Yum. That's all there is…

Lamb by Christopher Moore: Book Review

There are roughly 30 years of Jesus's life that are unaccounted for. Oh, there's the one story about him teaching in the temple when he was 12, but other than that, he was born and then he started his ministry around the age of 30. Christopher Moore has fun imagining what exactly Jesus--or Joshua, as Moore chooses to use the Hebrew name--might have gotten up to in the in-between years. I know what I'm thinking but I'm having trouble finding the right words. I think if you're going to be offended by this book, the title will turn you off right away. And that's obviously okay. But there might be a few people out there like me, who are thinking, "I'm pretty open-minded. I think I can handle it. But I do have lines that I don't want to have crossed, and Moore could cross them easily." I was okay with what he wrote here. Joshua is still absolutely the Son of God, without sin, sent to save mankind from our sins. That is never questioned. If it had been, I would have had to put the book down. But he does have fun, love, and learn from people from many countries and religions. That's the best I can do as far as the is-it-offensive-to-Christians thing. On to the good parts! I loved Biff! I wanted to reach into the pages and smack him upside the head a few times, but usually when that happened another character stepped in and smacked him for me. He was a horny, cheerful smartass who could teach dogs a thing or two about loyalty. He spends his entire life following Joshua around and trying to make sure that he stays out of trouble. He can always get Joshua laughing when he falls into a…